Say Something, The Zombies Are Coming

Texas Zombies is a unique kind of party game. It's especially unique because it uses a theme not often seen in party games – horror.

The Setup

When a group of students from the University of Texas take a field trip to an abandoned military complex in the heart of the desert, they find a lot more than an education. The place had been overtaken by drug dealers who have been using the cheapest source of labor known to man: Zombies.

Now, they have but one objective. They must survive a multitude of horrors and abominations with only one overwhelming desire – to make the students join them. Permanently.

So How Do You Play This?

From three to six players are secretly split into two teams, so that you won't know who you have on your side until the game is over.

Then, each player gets three objects cards. The first player draws one of the 30 event cards, and tries to explain (in under a minute) how he will get out of the tricky situation described on the card, using just the objects available to him (and, of course, his imagination).

The event card describes the number of objects to be used in this tale of the macabre. Once the player finishes telling his horrific story, the other players will vote to decide whether he was successful. If he wins, he keeps the card. The player draws three new items and a new round begins with the next player.

As soon as the last event card is resolved, the game ends and players reveal their team affiliations. The team with the greatest number of event cards (adjusted for lopsided team numbers) wins the game. This way, since you never know who is on your team, you'll be more likely to vote honestly.

A Quick Tour In Hell

Here's a short example of a game turn to give you an idea of the atmosphere in Texas Zombies.

Event Card: A student bitten by a zombie. Solution: Amputation!

Object Cards: A cat. A fork. A tube of superglue.

Philip explains to his audience how he handled this dire situation:

“I slowly approached the student. He was going into shock, eyes bulging at the amount of blood flowing from his right leg. That, or he was seriously upset about the mess all over his brand new shoes.

“'Dude, we have to do something!' I shouted. “The zombies are attracted by the smell of fresh blood, and if they show up, we can't fight them! Besides, if we don't act quickly, you'll turn into one of them and I was not planning on ending my evening as zombie snack food.'

“The student didn't seem to react, as he was completely overwhelmed by the seriousness of his situation. 'Don't you worry, little buddy,' I say, 'I'll just amputate.'

“Wasting no time, I used my tube of superglue to plug the leg wound, the way the GI's used to do it back in 'Nam. Then I glued his lips shut, because with what I was about to do, this guy was going to be a screamer. And everybody knows zombies follow loud noises.

“The poor kid didn't even protest. Yet. I picked up my fork, the closest thing I had to a cutting tool, and now his eyes registered abject horror. And some tears.

“'Don't worry, man! I've thought of everything! See this cat here? He'll help take your mind off the pain.'

“So I handed him the cat, whom I affectionately called Claws of Steel, and who had helped me out of some pretty tight spots. His specialty was shredding zombies.

“'Take this little bundle of joy into your arms and pet him while I... uh... cure your leg. The cat will distract you from the pain. Trust me, brother, it's the only way out of this mess.'

“The student nodded in understanding (he couldn't say anything, since his mouth was glued shut) and took the cat, gently scratching it between the ears.

“I attacked the student's leg with gusto, New Mexico butcher style. Not easy, cutting off a leg with a fork! The pain was so intense that the student (whose name I still did not know) squeezed the cat like a mother who had not seen her child in months.

“This was not a good idea. The cat was, after all, Claws of Steel, not some defenseless cherub. And he was kind of irritable.

“Annoyed, Claws tore directly into the student's vital organs in protest. The poor kid died almost instantly, before I could finish applying my first aid (which, it turns out, was also last aid). All my effort, wasted, just because the stupid kid freaked out! This made me very angry, and I plunged the fork into his brain before he could turn into another flesh-craving walking dead.”

So, are you convinced? Would you vote for Phillip?

If you're a fan of zombie movies and you like fun games with a bit of a morbid atmosphere, then Texas Zombies should be right up your darkened alley!